Wisdom from Naveen Varshneya on Betrayal

Betrayal – just reading this word stirs a multitude of emotions. Read here, an excerpt from Naveen Varshneya’s Vartalaap with the current Chetna batch, to go work through your burden of the experience of betrayal.

 

Betrayal

The breach of a promise…
…a process- the part of an arrangement.

Impact: It may lead to anger, fear, shame, guilt, self-pity, rejection, etc.

 

algorithm of betrayal

 

Promise >> Hope >> Positive emotions (safe/secure) – survival dependent on this promise

Placed faith & powers in a relationship, which promised to continue to love and sail you through life.

For instance,
Someone promises to pay you a certain amount every month.
This leads to hope and positive emotions as you feel safe and secure, and your survival is taken care of.
You placed faith and power in a relationship, which promised to sail you through life.
Now when you face betrayal in that relationship, it is that someone has left you with your lack (Rejection/Abandonment/Neglect) and in your Loop of Suffering.

 

Why does Betrayal hurt?

 

 

There are 2 sides to you and me in every given scenario – egoistic and non-egoistic self. We choose to operate from either one, depending on where we are in life.

 

 

When egoistic, you would believe that what has been promised is your right. When betrayed, you would feel deprived of your right. There would be a demand to return what was taken away; anger for what was promised and not delivered.

When in a non-egoistic space, you would never place complete faith in the promise. It doesn’t mean that you don’t have any trust, but you would have more faith in life and self. It would pain that you were betrayed; however, you wouldn’t turn hopeless, as you have faith in life and believe that one thing or another would come your way.

And it is quite possible that your belief makes you egoistic. Or that it doesn’t allow you to learn your lessons, which would help dissolve your pattern of inviting betrayal.

 

Faith, the lack of it

The Root of Suffering of the entire humanity is that we don’t have faith in ourselves.

We have been programmed and conditioned since childhood to place all energies in hands of someone else – partner/ employer/ friends.

We are in constant search of someone who would look after us and we refuse to look after ourselves.

 

 

To decode is to think scientifically as taught in the programs:
Make your flowchart > Arrive at your algorithm > See patterns in every event.

So, make your flowchart.

When you decode betrayal – decode to figure out your hopelessness and lack of faith in yourself.

 

 

A Corollary to The Betrayal series

Investment: When we invest in a relationship, we nurture, we believe, we give in a relationship and we have faith, hope, and trust. We hold a vision for the relationship. When we invest and receive betrayal, it directs us to pain.A classical example is – a mother invests in a child for 9 months in the womb.

Expense: We give in to a relationship, thinking that this relationship will now take care of me and I don’t have to do anything. We feel loved, protected and safe, and dependent on that person. That is when betrayal leads to hopelessness, anger, and lifelessness. We have spent ourselves in the relationship not invested.

Responses

Meditation – the cure

 “I just have one belief; I do not believe human life is for suffering”

Naveen Varshneya 

Our courses

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Discover the pattern which drove you to make choices to arrive at suffering. 

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3 month long Personalised program for Acute and Chronic cases.

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Nothing lives inside us without being fed by our breath.

While drawing our algorithm, we start with identifying our symptoms. Do we look at our symptoms of today or from our childhood? Our tendencies also seem like they are about today and not from our childhood. How should I interpret this?

You can start with identifying your symptoms today and make your Algorithm identifying your Lack, Tendency and Pattern. It may seem like the tendencies are loud and clear today. This is only because as an adult, you are either more aware of it, or the tendency is more pronounced. However, if you go back to that age group of 7-14, you will find that the same tendency existed back then as well.  

For example – your lack is abandonment and so your tendency is need to prove/ excel. As an adult, you try extremely hard to prove yourself at work, but maybe as a ten-year-old you wanted to make sure that you win a colouring competition or feel worthy by collecting the maximum number of berries or fruits. 

 So, you would notice how the nature of tendency existed even back then – sometimes subtly, sometimes pronounced. It is just a matter of developing sensitivity to recognize it in that time and space. However, you can always work with current scenarios. 

Now that I have made my algorithm and have identified my lack, what do I do with this? Do I have to re-visit my childhood?

In every moment of disappointment – current or past, you can experience the lack. There are two ways to attend to the lack, once identified – 

  1.  You may simply keep your Algorithm/Lack in awareness by writing the events of the current time and go into breathing 
  2. You can revisit your childhood and write about moments that you experienced the Lack/Algorithm and once you have written a few events (in detail), you may lay down and begin to observe your breath. 

In either of the processes, your Algorithm/lack is in your complete awareness and observing your breath after this would only bring an expansion in your awareness. 

After finding my LTP and mapping my algorithm, I can see how I have suffered in my childhood and continue to do so. What can I do to remedy this and reverse my suffering?

 Since you are seeking the cure, you must know that state of meditation is the state of cure. The more you are in this state, the more you move towards light, thus curing your suffering.  

All the things which come into your awareness, must now be attended to by Observing your breath. For process of attending to what has surfaced, refer to Ques no 8 

Now that I have made my algorithm and have identified my lack, what do I do with this? Do I have to re-visit my childhood?

In every moment of disappointment – current or past, you can experience the lack. There are two ways to attend to the lack, once identified – 

  1.  You may simply keep your Algorithm/Lack in awareness by writing the events of the current time and go into breathing 
  1. You can revisit your childhood and write about moments that you experienced the Lack/Algorithm and once you have written a few events (in detail), you may lay down and begin to observe your breath. 

In either of the processes, your Algorithm/lack is in your complete awareness and observing your breath after this would only bring an expansion in your awareness.