Forgiveness, Gratitude and Misunderstanding. Do We Really Need Them?

Jodha does not forgive Akbar when he happens to make the mistake of suspecting her despite his repeated attempts to seek forgiveness and yet her love and devotion for him do not change. In the Dilip Kumar starrer movie Shakti when his son (Amitabh Bachchan) is kidnapped, the son hears Dilip Kumar saying,

it is not important to save him vis a vis his first child and that is his duty. The child misunderstood his father and it goes on to show how they both suffer due to a child not being able to forgive his father. 

In our more routine mundane life, we face such situations often where we are forgiving now and then often as a compromise because we seem to believe that we have no choice but to live the relationship, hence we forgive. 

Forgiveness in such a case becomes a need that says that my virtues are not as important for my evolution as much as the need to have a relationship. Hindus will argue that forgiveness is divine and so is gratitude, as by doing so, you evolve and attain peace and come closer to enlightenment. When they say so, it turns out as if working towards enlightenment is the goal of the soul like a trainee aiming to be CEO of the company. It is an ambition imposed on the mental body of the person and a belief is created. A belief which has its roots in a need to evolve has a conflict with any path of enlightenment or liberation, which is and should be beyond the need to forgive. The need as conceived by mental body and the fear that we might go against the divine if we do not forgive and be in gratitude. 

On the other hand, Jodha or Amitabh Bachchan in Shakti carried the power within their soul. They believed in the relationship but in the case of Jodha, not without her virtues and in the case of Shakti not without protection, which from a child’s perspective, the father is the only source. They feel empowered enough to carry on to live without the relationship and take all the risk in their life not caring if they will survive or not. They chose a path which we may judge as wrong, full of pain or struggle and bitterness. But then whosoever sold the idea that happiness, peace, joy and surrender are supreme virtues of humanity, oversold the law of nature and forgot that the biggest virtue is to be authentic. Authentic to your pain through acceptance of wounds and hurt rather than pretending to be spiritual by choosing comfort, faking forgiveness and gratitude. No path can lead to liberation or enlightenment if that is what one is pursuing if he/she is not authentic. One must be willing to go through pain by breathing wounds till it reveals the wisdom and its purpose.  Such authentic people are beyond time and space and do not have any milestones for this lifetime. They are only concerned about following the sound of their soul and staying with it even if it means few lifetimes.

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